Status Quo

Entschuldige,

gestern sprach nur meine Gier,

wie ein wüstes, lüsternes Tier.

Ich bitte Dich sprich wieder mit mir?

Entschuldige,

gestern verschwand ich im Zorn,

Teufel und Horn.

Denkst Du wir können starten von vorn?

Kompliziert und verwirrt.

Ich habe mich, wie so oft schon geirrt.

Unbekannt verrannt.

Sind nun alle Bindungen verbrannt?

Gedanken stoßen an Schranken.

Mir bleibt wohl nur, mich bei Dir zu bedanken.

Double Trouble Bubble.

Was war, was ist… ungewiss.

A23 // Oct. 30, 2014

Neuer Tag / New Day

ein neuer tag.
heute.
hielt er was er versprach?
das weiß ich nicht
ich bin so leer
und müde
ich sehne mich so sehr
nach Dir und mir
so wie es war
gestern
ein anderer tag.
ein anderer tag.
morgen
wie wird es sein?
bin ich allein
oder sind wir zusammen
scheint die sonne
oder ist es der regen
der an das fenster klopft
und uns weckt
für
einen neuen tag.

a new day.
today
did it keep its promise?
i dont know
i feel so empty
so tired
and long so much
for you and I
as it was
yesterday
another day.
another day.
tomorrow
how will it be?
am i alone
or are we together
does the sun shine
or is it the rain
that knocks on the window
and wakes us
for
another new day

A23// Aug.14, 2009
23.53

Nothing But Blackness

deep in thought you sit there at your window
it shows nothing but blackness
but its not your eyes that see its your mind
and your mind explodes in all the colors when
your mind hears every silent whisper from
out of the blackness that I send to you

deep and lost in your sleep you lie on your bed
there is nothing but blackness
but its not your mind that sees its your heart
and your heart explodes in all the colors when
your heart hears every secret sigh from
out of the blackness cause I think about you

A23 //  Aug.6, 2009
17.30 - 17.35

It Is You

your face
i would cup in my hands -
caress your beautiful soul
gaze at you through tears
disbelief and facination
regret and selfpity -
to believe that this is real
another token of your love
flown to me
lovers angels wings
to warm my heart and keep it so
when i touch it,
it is you
when i smell it
it is you
when i see it,
it is you
i will cherish it until we meet again.

A23 // July 10, 2009

You ask me why i am crying?

---

I am crying because
I don’t feel the same for you anymore
I changed, You changed
I regret letting you go, slip out of my heart
I want you and my feelings back
I think, no, I fear its too late
I am unhappy with my life and all I say
I want you back oh god I want you back
I want you back, I need you
I miss you
I miss you so much 

 

 

A23// Jan. 22, 2009

Slipping

are we slipping away?
are we still who we used to be?
are we slipping apart?
are those your hands on my fingertips? slipping

I cant stop but feel you drift away
I cant stop but see the signs everywhere
I cant stop but hear your distraction (missing attraction) in your voice
I cant stop but wonder

are we slipping away?
are we still who we used to be?
are we slipping apart?
are those your footsteps walking away?

Remember how we used to love?
Remember how the passion blew us away?
Remember how you wrote me poems every night?
Remember how I sang for you every day?

are we slipping away?
are we still who we used to be?
are we slipping apart?
are those your keys to my flat you left for me to keep?

A23 // Jan. 15, 2009

To August

Like a leaf falls from a green tree
You left this world to be
You left on a sunny may day
The last of may, for you anyway

Standing here outside this chapel
With your family and friends,
Yes you had a couple
I wonder if this gap ever mends

This day is such a lovely one
The sun so nice and warm
The wind so fresh and fine
The birds so vivid and divine
No insect can ever do you harm
Cause this is the day but you are gone

It may sound like such a cheap clichee
But its just my thought; je me répète
I felt the tears stream down my face
And all I could do is wonder in this place
Why I have never got to know you any better?


A23 // June 7, 2008



this is to my uncles dad, who passed away may 31st.

Morphed

what was
will be gone
hidden
will be shown
uglyness
will turn to beauty
darkness
will change to light
pale
will be colourfull
coldness
will give room for warmth
emptyness
will be filled
lonelyness
will find true love
just like any caterpillar
will grow to be a wonderful butterfly

 A23 // April 7, 2008

Will never be

i dont appreciate what i got
i want what i have not
long for things to be
but i know they will never

i take what I have for granted
i rant and look at others with greed
pretend to be that angelic me
but i know i will never

i want to change everything around me
i want my life to be oh so different
wait for it to just fall in place and be
but i know it will never

hey, girl dont give up
hey, girl have you really tried?
hey, girl do what you have to
hey you litttle silly girl..
take your head out of the puffy clouds
hey you little lazy thing...
grow up
and
BE!!!


A23 // April 7, 2008

Blink and look away

do you know that feeling
when you´re full up
but still not satisfied?
you have everything but
you miss something you cant have?
usually i am happy
at least thats what everybody sees
no one sees
that abyss of sadness filled
with an ocean of longing
its right underneath the surface
you can see it in my eyes
when the tears well up,
i blink and quickly
look away.


A23 // Jan. 23, 2008

Thoughts

i think about you all the time
sometimes i think that
my thoughts can fly...
fly to you and caress you in your sleep
caress your beautiful soul

love grows in my heart like a flower
blooms in daylight and dies a painful death at night
blooms anew in the morning when my first thought is you
at night longing and pain come like a thief
and steal all the hope
leave me robbed & destroyed alone in the dark
sweet and bitter
pain of love

A23 // Jan. 23, 2008

Yeah, I Am Over You

the telephone rings and its you.
after all those years, what a delightful surprise
we talk about the weather, the job and whatever
and suddenly you say that you miss me
that you think about me a lot lately
and i still cant believe that my mouth stumbled... i mean mumbled
that it was the same for me.

yeah, i am over you.
I listen to the songs that you loved
the songs i always pretended to hate
with such a passion... i just loved to tease you
but i guess you never knew

oh yeah, i am over you.
i dont regret a thing
i dont regret we said goodbye
but i hate the fact that i really miss you
and each of those songs reminds me of you
reminds me of the little things
that used to make me tingle
and even now they still make me smile.

oh god yeah, i am over you.
Our relationship is over for a while now
yet i still feel connected, feel that we´re good friends
And yeah, i think we always will, cause you´ll
always be a part of my life.

oh yeah... yeah... i am over you.
no, i dont regret a thing.
i am so glad that we still talk and that the anger in me
didnt take over. glad the hurt is past,
glad the anger is gone.
And you know... I´ll always keep that little
weak spot for you in my heart

yeah... i tell myself that i am over you
but god... sigh... how come i wonder how
nice it would be to date you once again?

A23 // Jan. 23, 2008

At The Coast

If i was going to the ocean this year
Early in the morning
I´d stand at the beach or on a cliff
Staring into your direction
Miles and miles beyond the Horizon
Where you are, living your life
Work, eat, sleep… beep beep
And I imagine you
I see you in my mind
And I again, like so many times wish impossible things
The wishes fill my eyes and roll down my cheeks

And to make it all better for me
I´d write you a letter and name all my dreams
My wishes, my hopes, how much you mean to me
And in how many ways I love you
How I Miss you.. and all and everything about you
I´d write it all down
A long letter
Then i´d roll it up and put it in the empty bottle
Of the sweet wine that I had the night before
I´d close it with the red coloured cork
Throwing it into the sea
Watch it float and jump in the surf
Hoping that you might find the message
on your vacation to the beach

A23 // Aug. 3rd, 2007

unexpected turn

The long and winding road took an unexpected turn
Through fields of corn it winds
Damp clouds rising from the dewy ears
The road glistens wet from the late spring rain
All dust and cover washed away,
soon to be blown dry by a strong breeze
I follow the road, wherever it may take me
My hair ruffled and tossled
My cheeks cherry red
I see you in the distance
I keep on walking
And hope the road
brings me back to you
when i knock at your door
will you open it for me?

A23 // May 11, 2007

Torn

torn apart between love and fear
one part happy the other afraid
afraid to lose what we have
afraid to make a mistake
afraid that you might leave me
afraid it might be over too soon
happy because you´re here
happy to know you
happy to love you
happy to spend each moment with you
sad happyness
unsure confidence
hesitant yearning
torn in two
my heart aches
it aches...

A23 // May 4, 2007


revised:
torn apart between love and fear
one part happy the other afraid
afraid to lose what we have
happy to love you
afraid to make a mistake
happy to know you
afraid that you might leave me
happy because you´re here
afraid it might be over too soon
happy to spend each moment with you
sad happyness
unsure confidence
hesitant yearning
torn in two
my heart aches
it aches...

Gesichtslos / Without A Face

i wrote this today... inspired by my day at work in the loud factory...
wrote it in german and translated it afterwards.. i hope that i managed to translate it in an incisive way...

Gesichtslos

Ich bin da und doch sieht man mich nicht (Huff-puff-fiep)
Nein nicht unsichtbar, aber… (Huff-puff-fiep)
Man sieht mich nicht. (Huff-puff-fiep)
Nein, man sieht durch mich hindurch (Huff-puff-fiep)
Ganz so, als wäre ich nicht da. (Huff-puff-fiep)
Oder als wäre ich ein Ding (Huff-puff-fiep)
Eine Maschine. Ja, eine Maschine. (Huff-puff-fiep)
So wie alle hier. Lauter Maschinen. (Huff-puff-fiep)
(Huff-puff-fiep)
Viele aus Metal, manche aus Fleisch. (Huff-puff-fiep)
Alles was sie sehen, ist ein paar arbeitende Hände. (Huff-puff-fiep)
Alles was zählt sind die Zahlen. (Huff-puff-fiep)
Für die dort oben…(Huff-puff-fiep)
Bin ich nicht da. (Huff-puff-fiep)
Man kennt mich nicht. (Huff-puff-fiep)
Bin Gesichtslos.


Without a face

I am here yet not to be seen (Huff-puff-squeak)
No, not invisible…but (Huff-puff-squeak)
They dont see me. (Huff-puff-squeak)
No, they look straight through me (Huff-puff-squeak)
As if I wasnt there, so it seems (Huff-puff-squeak)
Or as if I was a thing (Huff-puff-squeak)
A machine. Yes, a machine. (Huff-puff-squeak)
Just like everyone here. All some machines. (Huff-puff-squeak)
(Huff-puff-squeak)
Lots made of metal, some made of flesh. (Huff-puff-squeak)
All they see, is a pair of working hands. (Huff-puff-squeak)
All that counts are the numbers and figures. (Huff-puff-squeak)
For them up there… (Huff-puff-squeak)
I am not here. (Huff-puff-squeak)
They dont know me. (Huff-puff-squeak)
Am without a face.

A23 // April 11, 2007

Peek behind the curtain

here we are
stuck in this reality
longing to change the world
living the dream only once a week

once a week
thats when I hear your voice
thats when we talk about all we have
thats when everything explodes to technicolor

my mind is reeling
my heart jumping
my soul swimming
soaring up on cloud nine

and when we have to say goodbye
we take a big peek behind the curtain
yes, we see the reality
yet we do our best to ignore it all week
until we can meet and dream again.

A23 // April 7th, 2007

What a difference!

one idea... 2 poems.. dealing with the same idea... the fact that a smile and a nice word from a stranger can make such a difference... and I also thought... if a strangers smile does that... how much more would smile from a loved person do? I didnt quite manage to bring that into any of the poems... but think about it, who makes the difference for you today?

What a difference 1

What a difference it makes
To get a smile from
Someone
Just anyone

What a difference it makes
To enjoy the
Day
Just any day

What a difference it makes
To feel the warmth of
The Sun
anytime

What a difference it makes
To like the person in the
mirror
Any mirror

What a huge difference it makes
To receive a smile from
YOU, not
just anyone


What a difference 2

Today someone flirted with me
When I was out doing sports
A smile and a friendly comment
What a difference

Out of the blue
I was all sweaty and red in the face
I didnt even feel in the mood for a flirt
And then…

On my way home I realised
How happy i felt all out of a sudden
How sweet the day suddenly felt
What a difference

Within a few seconds that one smile
Turned the day, reminded me to live
Live the moment, try to be as happy
As one can be

I am so grateful to that stranger
For the mood I am now in
For what realised again
What a difference

So I sit here the pen in my hand
Bewildered and mesmerised by
All the good feelings flooding
My usually worry filled mind

And then I think of you
Wondering who is gonna
Smile for you and make you say
What a difference

A23 // March 13th, 2007

One Wish For Free

if i had a wish for free
i know what that would be
because you mean the world to me

because with you i want to stay
every night and every day
thats what i want to say

i love you so incredibly much
i long everyday for your touch
never want to let you out of this clutch

if i only had one wish for free
i know exactly what it would be
because you mean the world to me


A23 // Nov. 2005

Among the trees

among the trees
there is one that looks divers
theres one to catch your eye
there is one that glows
there one to blind the eyes
there one to surprise
theres one
only one
thats not like all the others
among all those trees
none is exactly like this
so exceptional
so unexpectational
so seemingly unreal
so out of this world
among all those trees
how can one not see
this tree is like you and me

A23 // Oct. 2005



a tree that was planted for exactly ONE day in the garden of the tree nursery in our neighbourhood inspired me to writing this... this is the picture i took that day

You can live a thousand lives

You can live a thousand lives
A million and a million days
And never know what love is

You can drink all you want
You can eat all you want
And never know how love tastes

You can hear as much music
You can listen as hard as you want
And never hear how love sounds

You can feel all sorts of things
You can touch all sorts of things
And never know how loves feels

You can look around all you want
You can try to open your eyes as hard as you want
And never know what love looks like

I am still young, and I am sure
I haven’t seen, all there is to see
I haven’t felt, all there is to feel
I haven’t tasted, all there is taste
I haven’t heard, all there is to hear

And yet,
This love I have for you
There is nothing bigger
That, I have seen and felt
I heard your heart and mine replied.
Whatever will come,
Whatever life may have in store for me
Whatever it holds in store for us
I am ready
I am not afraid
Because I know what love is
I know I have it with you.
And that will always stay.


A23 // Febr. 15th, 2007

I See A Tear

I see a tear roll down your face
I stretch out my hand
My finger touches just that place
To catch the tear and carry it

I walk with it a thousand steps
Cradle it in my hand
So precious, not to be spilled
in the thirsty sand

I reach my destination
A secret garden
A few steps past the drought
So green and lush

I kneel down and look down
At such a beauty
I water the plant to grow
with your tear


A23 // Febr. 12th, 2007

To M., who lost his Mum that day

Wishing I

Here I stand thinking about you
Missing you like only I could miss you
Wishing I could see you
Wishing I could hear you
Wishing I

Will tomorrow be a better day?
Can I touch your heart again
Just like I did yesterday?
Can I be your girl again
Just like on the first day?

So I am standing here thinking about you
Missing you like only I could miss you
Wishing I could see you
Wishing I could hear you
Wishing I
Wishing I
Wishing I
Wishing I

Here I stand thinking about you
Missing you like only I could miss you
Will tomorrow be a better day?
Can I touch your heart again
Just like I did on the first day?


A23 // Febr. 12th, 2007

Night Falls

when the night falls,
when the day ends
when the only light
is your soul shining in the night

when the wind stops
when the rain drops
when the only sound
you hear is my voice whispering to you

when the leaves go limb
when all fruits are gone
when the only taste
you relish is the juice of passion

when the buds are closed
when the bees hold their winter sleep
when the only smell
in the air is the scent of our longing

when the air is chilly
when your breath forms little clouds
when the only touch
you feel is my hand on yours

then you´ll know the time has come
then you´ll know where to go
then you´ll know where you´ll find me
see me, hear me, taste, smell and feel me

...to love

my sweetest love

A23 // 2006

Ode to you

can you hear my voice calling you
a million miles away
a million sighs, a million smiles
you cause, all you.....ohhh you....you!!
You make me feel so high
oh i can already touch the sky
and still we have to say goodbye
thats when i sigh, yeah
sometimes i even cry
yet most of the time just
the thought of you makes me smile
such bliss to know you
such luck to have met you
that sunny day in may
with a bottle full of strawberries
these memories will forever stay
you turned my life 180°
thanking god for that on my knees
you´re the best thing in my life
thanks for being you
thanks for all you do
as if you didnt know...
i love you so!

A23 // 2006

Shortcomming of a mirror

you say my face sometimes glows
but how would i know?
a mirror never shows
if a face glows

A23 // 2006

Bad Day

i am ready to crumble (i stumble)
i am ready to give up
all i want is for this all to stop
no hope left, not one drop

i am standing here alone
naked down to the bone
water running down my cheek
not just from the shower

punching tiled walls
a voiceless cry
is this how you die?
punching punching til it hurts

haunted, caught up in this life
i dont see the way no more
is there a way? go? stay?
man what a fucking bad day!!!

A23 // Jan. 2007

Knowing

To know
That there are things we cant ever have
That we cant ever share
That we wont ever be that close
That all we can do is this
That it takes too much to do what we cant do
That you wont ever see
That you wont ever smell this towns air
That you wont ever swim these waters
That you wont ever taste these tastes
That you and I must stay within these lines
That we have to keep on dreaming of what can never be
That you cry on your way to work
That I cry just the same
That all we can do is hope and pray
That I want you more than I could ever say
That it kills me to know all these things
That there are a million things more
That we cant ever have
That this is the best we can ever have
That you and I
That I and you
But to know
That you love me and
That I love you
That this is the fucking best and
It is all I need know.


A23 // Nov. 2006

Poets, Gather At My Feet

poets, gather at my feet
tonight my words will be your feed

poets, spread the seed
all birds need to eat

poets, hear the muses heart beat
catch her song before she retreats

poets, hum with me in the streets
lets satisfy this world, give it what it needs

poets, drop lines and notes everywhere,
so that the world knows that the poets care....


A23 // Oct. 2006

Haunted

Who tells you that
when you die in a dream
that you are still alive in the real world?
that you wake up in the same world ?
How do you know that the bed you went to sleep in IS
in fact the same that you went to sleep in?
what if the world turned in your sleep?
what if all the worlds are the same?
and only your exsistance is the one divers thing?
How would you know?
Would you want to know?
What if you realized that the world you woke up in
was not the same anymore?


A23 // Sept. 2006

The Humming Tree

How often have I thought about
How it would be to walk with you
Down this long and winding road
How often have I dreamt of
Showing you the Humming Tree

The Humming Tree? You ask
I say yeah, let me show you
And I take you by the hand
We walk and walk
A small and winding road
Through the part of town where I live
Past farmers barns and horses
The birds are singing and the sun
On our backs… so warm...mmhh

what is the humming tree? you say
I put my index finger on your lips
Shhhhhh, don't speak, you´ll see.
And I pull you further along that road
Until we come to a big old lime tree
We stop right underneath it
I step behind you and whisper
Close your eyes and listen


Your eyes closed
You hear
The tree
Humming
I watch you
The world around us turns
You smile and
Open your eyes.
You nod and say
Yes this is the humming tree
Above us a million bees
Living in that tree

But this is just in my mind
Just another fantasy
A dream so unlikely to come true
Instead I walk alone
Past the humming tree
Thinking of you and me
Underneath this tree


A23 // Sept. 2006

when touch becomes an urge

when touch becomes an urge
when urge is pushing you
when longing fills you
when love makes your ears ring
when the heart races
when hands tremble
when words touch you deep
when ....


when touch becomes an urge
when urge pushes you
when the pushing fills you with longing
when longing for your lover rings in your ears
when love makes your heart race
when the heart trembles in lovers hands
when hands touch you deep
when touch is only from words
when words are all you have
when all is one
i am you

when words cant come out right
when i sit here struggling to speak
when you are so far away
when i dont know when and where
when i try and try
when i love you like i do
when your words sink into me and
come back with tears
when the sky is grey like today
when i long to see you, talk to you everyday
when you, ohh...you....
when you speak to me i know it all
when you sigh i sigh
when i speak you listen
when you laugh the heaven and i celebrate
when ....
when i think i need to start over again...
when i am so foolish to carry on...


this was an idea i was working on.... basically 3 attempts... but somehow i like th way all 3 attempts form a picture.... so i kept it like this...

 A23 // June 2006

After A Big Fight

So this it?
This is how it feels? (empty)
Every Song seems to tell me now
to move on
to leave you
to forget you
to find someone new
that i deserve better
and talks about the end.
No, that cant be just by accident.
No, no, no. (fate)

Its cold, so cold here.
I used to like your place
and just like that i feel so strange
(misplaced)
and unwelcome here.

So this is it?
This is how it feels?
You told me so often
that you love me so much
but why dont you even bother
to fight for us?
Is that how you love me from all
of your heart?
Just to turn your back on me
when things dont go that smooth?
A bump in the road and you drop me?
say that you dont care
(not speaking at all?)
fall asleep as if nothing
happened?

What do you dream tonight?
What will you say
when you find me here on the floor
after you finally woke up,
find me still awake
the liquid salt lines finally dried
Hours of pacing, bleeding, thinking
denying, regretting, rethinking
moving on, hesitating, regrets
and loss
heartache?
Fear!
Move on!
I cant!
MOVE ON!

Heart and mind fighting the
cruelest fight, back and forth
and I am cheering for one
then for the other.
Goodbye! No,no no!
Walk on, Move on
No, please & liquid salt.

What my mind knew all along
what my heart still denies
and fears
what brings me to tears
Yes i know what i should do
what i should have done right away.
Never be alone again, but i
cant be with you anymore.

Even though
it hurts
(i loved you) (yes i think i did)
but i know i´ll live
Is this it? Is this what you
wanted?
And if its not why dont you stop me
before I can execute?
Goodbye.
No one ever told me that forever was this short.

A23 // Oct. 2007

When I come to you

All week long I wait for this one day
When I come to you
All day long I imagine how you'd kiss me
Touch me passionately
I am dressed up in my favorite clothes
L onging for you to unwrap me

Like a precious gift

Ravish me kiss me caress me
Press me tight

When I come to you I want to give you
All of my heart
Melt in your loving arms
My eyes full of love and desire
Take me, love me, take me
Over and over again
Take me, love me
You are my longing
Make me complete
When I come to you


I had a little help with this one.. for  couldnt grasp it on my own... thanks for that.

A23 // Oct. 2007
 

Impossible

i wish i was a good writer
a poet maybe
to put it all into words
someone to do the feelings i have for you justice
someone who could impress you
and touch your heart like with velvety gloves
with all those clever lines and
those witty rhymes

i wish i was that singer
with that big beautiful voice that
simply breaks your heart
with those fragile notes
those harmonics that float above your head
like my love on little butterfly wings
raining down like warm summer rain

i wish i was that sunset
that burns so bright and red
and almost stings your eyes
you may have seen it a thrillion times
before yet each time makes you gasp
and long and yearn for more

but i am none of that.
i am only me, this tiny little me
me
and then when i realise
that i do impress you in some
magical way
impossible
how in all the world can it be?
how can it be me that you see
that its me who you love
my god this feeling simply
kills me. its impossible.


A23 // Sept.2007

Red Air Inside

red air inside
a window wide open
to turn red into blue
a falling star lights the midnight sky
a wish was made
red air turned into blue
ever hoping for the wish to come true

A23 // July 17, 2007

Time

Time is one of the most precious goods that we can share
So dont complain about how we only have words…
The important part to it is that we share time
Time
You never know how much time you got left
You cant check it like your purse to see if you can afford
To spend time with
Jobs
You dont like ( maybe never did)
Places
You dont want to be (anymore)
People
You dont love (enough)
Time is a precious good
Dont waste a single second
Spend it wisely
If I spend my time with you
I know it is spent the best way
We both know this is all we got
There is no time to borrow
There is no second chance (at least not in this life)
Lets do it right (now)
Do all the things you want to do as long as you got time
Dont let there be regrets at the end of the day
So dont complain about how we only have words
Make the time you got worth your heartbeat
Its the time that counts
Spend it wisely



A23 // June 2nd, 2007